Tuesday Next

Right now, my focus is on Tuesday next. No, this is no relation to Thursday Next, the heroine of Jasper Fforde's novels. Jan 26, Tuesday next, is when I get to go have my belly sliced, patched and re-sewn.

Day. Can't. Come. Soon. Enough.

Injury is in the groin, but the pain extends from my mid-thigh up to my chest, as all the muscles around the injury are starting to fail from the fatigue of compensation.

Lying absolutely still is merely uncomfortable. Everything else actively hurts. Sitting, standing, walking, breathing, talking, eating, pissing, shitting... the only bright spot is that sitting and typing doesn't hurt anymore than just sitting. Which means I can share this experience with you.

I feel like I have the snipped and sharp end of a red hot wire, the thick high-current kind, jammed deep into the flesh next to my scrotum, set to give me an electric shock with every heartbeat. Everything around it feels like a four day old bone bruise, the kind that kaleidoscopes through blacks and greens and purples.

I am so utterly NOT comforted by the inescapably character-building nature of the five days remaining between me and the nadir of this experience.


  1. Hope all goes well - have they giving you morphine injections? They space you but they work quiet well.


  2. Thanks, Saffy. I don't know exactly what the meds will be. Unfortunately, as I explained to the doc, I'm mostly immune to the novocaine family of painkillers. That limits what they can do for me during surgery. It also limits the non-addictive options for pain relief immediately post-op and in the days following.

    I'd rather be a tough guy for a couple of weeks, relying on ice packs and tylenol, than end up with a percoset problem. I'm rather terrified of addictions.

  3. Having had surgery twice, I can tell you that the thinking of it is the scariest part.

    Yes, there's pain later but truly quite manageable by pain killers. I did use percocet and it helped a lot!

    And, no, there was no urge for more after bottle was empty. (pharmacy doesn't give you that much)

    Anyway, hope you feel better really quickly after all is done.

  4. Oh man, that sounds painful! I understand the hesitancy for pain meds. If you don't have any addiction problems in the past, the pain relief may be welcome. Maybe you can talk to Dr. about all the options.

    I send you positive energy for your surgery - I just got out of gallbladder surgery a couple months ago. I took different pain meds, can't remember what they were, but they did help with pain. It was more of an absence of pain and gave me the ability to sleep rather than a high of any kind.

    Hope you find the right balance for pain relief! Good luck and get well soon!

  5. Your writing ability extends to this description of your discomfort. All I can say is "Ouch!"

    Hope it all goes well next week and your recovery is swift.

    - MEG

  6. Marisa, Anne & Meg: thanks for the good wishes. My only experience with surgery was a horrible one, as the pain management was horribly botched. I still sometimes have nightmares about that experience.

    I don't mind admitting that I'm feeling a bit gun shy here. True, the anticipation of pain makes the run-up all the worse, but I've never been very good at controlling my own brain. It does what I tell it to only when I force it onto a path for writing story.

    Next week's FridayFlash is going to be either hysterically funny, or absolutely tragic, depending on how this whole thing goes.

  7. Best wishes Tuesday. It sucks having to endure like that, but it will be better soon enough.

  8. Tony - I totally understand your fear - i had c-sections with both of my kids and the pain of the last bit of my pregnancies was worse than the recovery from surgery. For me, advil was my friend and it was sufficient during my recovery, but be sure to talk to your doc about all the options. As has been mentioned, sleep will be your friend after the surgery, so maybe something to help you sleep will be enough. Anyway - I'm sending you "get well" and "don't stress out" vibes - I hope you receive them :-)

  9. D. Paul & PJ: Thanks, guys. The more I stress about it, the worse I feel, so I've made a conscious decision to just let it happen.

    I'm a pretty tightly wound person, and it bothers me when I don't have all my ducks in a row. This is a clear case of things being seriously ducked up. And what is the best thing to do in such cases?

    Relax and go with the flow.

    I'm working on it.


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