Revising a script

I finished the second draft of an audio script I'm working on. On the last pass through, I cut a bunch of sloggy crap that was slowing down the fourth scene and fixed up the ending.

Scenes 1 and 2 are still too slow, but I'm not sure how to fix them yet. This is my first play, and setting things up take a little expository dialogue. It helped a lot w/re: to punching things up by making the exposition in Scene 1 in the form of an argument among three people instead of a discussion between two. It needs to be tighter still, though.

Working on it.


  1. Look on the bright side; at least you know it needs tightening up :)

  2. Good point. When I was re-reading it and started saying "blah, blah, blah" to myself, I knew that whole bit had to go.

  3. I've only ever written two plays, and only one of those was a serious attempt. However...

    I am friends with a gentlemen with years of directing, producing, and writing plays. So if you would like it passed on for criticism (though likely not until mid-November), I'd be happy to pass it on.

  4. Thanks, Paul, but my deadline to get it to my producer is Oct 31. I think I may end up crowding that as it is.

    On the one hand, I'm tempted to send him the draft as it stands, just to give him a general sense of what's coming. OTOH, I don't want to scare him with a sluggish piece that isn't done yet.


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